Warning This Topic is NOT For the Femininaly Sensative

So I was watching my show...Real Housewives of Atlanta, and Lisa mentioned she used the NuvaRing and I had a Gyno appointment coming up. So I let the doctor know that I was interested in changing birth control from the pill to the NuvaRing. I should have changed my mind when she said the muthfucka was $50 for one ring, but i inquired with my insurance company and they said I could get 3 for $80...so I'm like damn what a deal....so i get my prescription and head to Kroger. I get to the Kroger pharmacy and that lady tells me that it will be $120 for 3 rings and i get all confused....to get to the point I got one for $40, took it home and put it in. The packaging says specifically "you should not be able to feel the NuvaRing once inserted" so for the first 20 minutes I didn't and then all of a sudden it felt like something was trying to crawl out of me. So I go to the bathroom and what to a see...the little plastic ring sticking out.

SO let me explain this before i go any further...

As you can see from the diagram the Ring should be near the Green writing but it some how ends up near the Black writing. I have no conclusions because they claim that after sex it could fall out but after sex it always ends up in the perfect position for days even forget that it is there. But now I am just done I really think I am just going to go back to the pill, I mean at least with the pill I know it will stay in place and do its job. Well I just wanted to say that cuz it was grinding my gears.

Fall Rant

So it is flu seasin and who knows better than me. I have been out of commission for a week and I feel like shit. The flu took my body and I don't kno how to get it back. It started with a sore throat then and aching everything then I just simply felt like shit. After that I was left with this cough. Oh this cough is going to be my dimise. My throat itches andthen I cough uncontrollably for a long time this leaves me with a headache and a still itching throat. I will never get well I feel like I am dying. Oh did I mention that the coughing is making me throw up. Yes a lot. I can't keep a damn thing down when I start coughing. I just want this shit to be over. It is not sexy at all.

NAP TIME LOVE

So I'm about to take a nap before I go to work but I just wanted to stop in to get real and say I appreciate everyone who reads my blog and I wish u all the best in life.

Now I'm sleepy and I must go...MUAH MUAH. Luv

Life's Riddle: Who, When, Where?

Who?
I am the bloom of a flower on a summers crisp day
I am the melting of the ice from that summer suns ray
I am the dream that exhales from the eyes of all day
I am the growth of the seed that was blown a stray

When?
It was a time when the world needed to free space
When every where that u went was the perfect place
When time was slow and man knew no race
When women carried themselves with style and grace

Where?
It is a place where men and women can all me free
Where there's no I, me, them, or us, just WE
Where things are asked of you and there is no decree
Where u can be a somebody with no degree

These are the question asked of me
Where will I go and who will I be
I answer these questions simply
I am who I am and I'll be who I be

The Death of My Future

If you dont know who this young man is I suggest you turn on a TV, Radio, internet anything and look at it. This is Derrion Albert and this young man was beaten to death last month by a group of teenagers, and yes it was recorded and put on the internet(our generation I guess). Just talkin about this is making me sad and making me want to cry. Please research him for me so you can know why I am saddened. But recently I have been rethinking my desire to move to Chicago and I really think that this has mad my decision for me. I have never really felt this way about these things..I have watched fights on YouTube all the time but this one touched me. It is disgusting how our blck youth are killing one another and no one seems to want to talk...How can I dream of raising my children in a place where they may not live to see 17 y/o. Something needs to be done because if this is the future...the world is in danger....I cant type anymore My eyes are clouded by my tears.

Discussion: My CRACK

Its been a minute since we had one of these, I guess because nothing really seemed that important to me for a while, but yesterday I relapsed from my rehab on my addiction and not I'm going effin crazy. For those of you who don't know I am addicted to "The Sims" and yes it is my crack. I have been a video game whore for years, from the time I got a Super Nintendo,to first time I got on the internet at my parents house, to the first time I bought a computer game (Dark Earth then Tomb Raider),to the PS1,2 and 3 , and all of them have had the same time freezing, life numbing affect on my life. With all those games I eventually got bored not necessarily with the games but with staying up for hours and hours knowing that I have shit to do the next day. But the Sims does something to me. I was up until 4AM this morning playing that damn game knowing I had to wake up at 540AM. Every time I looked at the clock I was saying to myself that "all ill need is a nap" or "I won't be that tired in the morning" but that's how it starts. In the past I have stayed up for 2 and a half days playing and playing the Sims. Not noticing that the sun was back up or that it had ever gone down. So what happened last night was not as bad as the past but its a sign that it can only get worse. The Sims 3 has come along (just like all of the Sims games in the past) and pushed all of my other activities aside,homework,blogging,studying, reading,watching ANTM, watching RHoATL, and all the other things you know I do. I thought I could just play for a little while and then step away from the computer at a reasonable hour but I couldn't. I even stopped to take a shower and came right back. I am sad about my relapse but the game is very fulfilling and a great stress reliever. Well I am trying to stay awake now and this is a struggle. Why do I do these things to myself?

Have You Ever

Have you ever just woke up and wanted to go back to sleep...thats how i felt when i woke up this morning...I was ready to just thro the towel in on the day and give up. But I have to build a drive and make myself do what needs to be done...So I am at the library..and i can feel my spirits lifting...I am still a little upset but if i keep myself busy i think I will be alright.

Yawn!!!!

SoI guess this may be a little silly but I'm in class and bored out of my mind.


And so is my friend Darryl
Just thought I would make that known!!!!

Pissed....

Dell just screwed me...like really bad...let me tell you my story.


So my homegirl bought me the Sims 3 and anyone who knows me knows I am a Sims fanatic. Well I download the game on my new Dell Inspiron mini 10v. I go to play the game and the computer tells me the graphics card is not found. So at 4 something in the AM I call Dell. And obviously at this time of the morning there is no one on Dell's payroll that speaks English as there first language, But I deal with it. I talk to one person after the next. Then I get to this guy who seems to be helping me but I guess not....

I tell him I need 2GHz and I keep saying I need gigahertz, he is just saying gigz so i figure we r on the same damn page...and we were but this M-effer was in the GB RAM book and I was in the GHz book. So I just spent $45 om 2 GB RAM that I dont need. So i go to try to cancel it but guess what...the people who speak English dont come in until 8AM....BS total BS.....what happened to 24 hour customer service. By the time I get to talk to someone it will be too late to cancel my order.

I would say the money is not an issue but it is if I am getting something I do not want or need...and I still cant play the damn Sims.....

FAIL

New Computer

Hey yall I just wanted to say that I got my new computer...SO be looking for me to be blogging a little bit more. And I will be def getting more homework done.....This is so great...and I found my web cam and I got a new video camera.....Cindy is most def going mobile.

ITS MY MICHAEL'S BIRTHDAY

So I am posting a tone of pics of Michael for what would have been his 51st Birthday....I still love this man and his music and you should too...I mean come on he is the fucking greatest....

THE KING LIVES FOREVER

She just looks so comfy with her big bro

I love this damn song and I love them together

Brotherly Love

Where it all began

Michael and his little princess

Michael with his sisters

Michael being a daddy

MJ not looking too "Thrilled" LOL

Gotta love Michael

What the fans really see

Deep thought MJ

Marketing MJ

The Baddest MJ of them all...LOL

Little Dreaming Michael

Baby MJ

Good is Good

I'm doing good. My life is on a roll. I have friends and fam that love me and I am learning to get over things much easier. I have money and I can't ask for anything more. Ill be back tomorrow with my planet and shit but I juat have to rant on things. This is mostly for my bestie. He has been going thru some shit and its a life changing thing. I'm not saying he was immature at first but he was doing too much LOL. Now he is waking up. I am glad he is good and I think I am more glad that he has me LOL. He is way to hard on himself.

School Bells: The Proclamation

Hey Hey Hey...I hear those school bells ringing so u know its time to get in there. I am trying to decide what my style for this semester will be but its hard because I am a different kinda chick. I think I'm going with animal print...but i also bought a lot of v necks and beaters...but i will still be incorporating animal print you'll see me LOL. Plus with my new natural hair I think I'm ready to kick off this senior year hard. Today i am doing laundry and I need to buy some shades and shoes...I have my $40 Mani and I'm doing my free Pedi tonight...I HOPE...Things are looking ^UP^ and I am excited. Senior year is going to be my year and May 22, 2010 is going to be my day. So please remember that I said that and when I'm down please refer me back to this post if you care about my sanity. Well I'm off to do stuff.....Love You Guys

I Say This With A Straight Face

WHY do I always let myself get used up to the point where there is nothing left for me. WHY do ppl fail to believe that I have feelings too, no they kno I have feelings they just try to test me. I have gone thru so many friends in these past 22 years of my life and now I realize that my friendship is too hard. If u never had a friend who cared enough about you to check on you, to offer their assistance and just be there without asking for a damn thing in return then u r not ready for a friends like me. I have had sudden breaks and hard breaks from friends but none hurt worse than the ones who just don't understand who you are. I am a real person, I don't get any more real. I laugh hard, play hard, cry hard, and I fall hard. But I need a friend now. I need someone who can be my backbone because that is hard to find. They all say they are different for me to only find out they just have a different name with different skin but the same mind set. It amazes me how most of my friendships r so one sided. Only because I allow them to be. I play like on a hard ass but I'm really a kitten. I hurt just like everyone else but no one seems to realize this or care. As I write this I am however realizing that there is hope for me to find that friend. I just need to be open. So this is what I have come to. I want to thank the ppl who understand my pain and understand that sometimes I need a break too. And I want to thank the people who don't want to take the time to understand me but simply want to reap the benefits of our friendships. Because these two groups of ppl are the ones who make me a better friend and I am more than open to that.

The People I Call Friends

I think I have a problem with calling ppl my friends too quickly. Let me tell u about some of the ppl I call my friends.
One of my So Called Friends(SCF) decided it would be a good idea to tell me how they felt they needed an explanation as to why I don't chill with them anymore. When I was pretty sure I told this SCF that I was broke and starving. So all I do is work go to the gym and sleep because I have no money to eat. I didn't say anything when this same asshole stopped talking to me for almost a fucking month.

Then don't get me started on this SCF that does not respond to any of my any kind of messages until they want something and then when I call them out on it they have the fuckin nerve to get upset with me. Really that's how u feel. This person should be lucky they r back in my life period after the emotional confusion they took me thru.

And the new SCF. That was texting me everyday now I don't even get a hey because I told them NO for the first time. The fuck outta here with that little kid shit.

You kno what I'm just done. I am no longer allowing walk-ins into my life. From now on u need 3 references, an appointment for an interview and a fuckin resume.

Feed Me Semore....

So you guys....I have been hungry for the past 2 or 3 days. I am dreaming about food LOL. Friday I swear Walmart is going to hate me. Im going to shop like I have food stamps. I have already made my grocery list now if i can just get everything taken care of all will be well . So continue to pray for me.....Cuz my ribs r touching....

We're In The Money

I am just checking in with my faithful followers and letting you know that all of my time away from my blog was worth it because now I have money and Honey I wont complain. It was a hard two weeks of working sun-up to sun-down but I can smile now. I will be going grocery shopping Friday so I wont have to be hungry like I have been being for the past 3 or 4 days. Thanks for praying for me and thanks for caring.....Now back to the silliness that is Cindy....

What is the World coming to????!!!!

So I was on one of my fave blogs to follow now...youknowyoudeadazzwrong.blogspot.com and I saw this video that pissed me the fuck off. Watch it then I will say my piece.




OK so why in all the hell can these little girls do this shit. I am a grown ass woman and I dont do this shit...I think it is a fuckin shame that not only was this recorded but it was allowed. With all the little boys around watchin and kids cheering her on....can u say child pornography...fuck outta here

More than ANNOYED...

Why can't I have along day of stupidity that ends in relaxation. That shit never can and apparently never will happen. The more annoyed I am throughout the day the more annoyed I will be by the time I have to lie my head down. I am so sick of money and having to pay bills that I shouldn't have to pay. I am tired of having a broke as man. I love him don't get me wrong but he has given himself way more shit than he can handle finacially and now I am stuck paying half of all of the shit he said he could handle. That gets on my fuckin nerves. I worked more hours this week than he did. I don't get over time and I am trying to keep myself out of debt but I sit here and my credit (because of him) is slowly depleiting. I don't get help with any of the bills he helps to run up but yet and still I am forced to do what I have to do. Fuck that shit. Just fucki it...

Contagious and They Spread

So I was sitting here at work thinking...you know that's how I live my life...always thinkin about shit well I was thinking about things that are weird like...
*Smiles are contagious- like if u r upset someone can make u smile simply by smiling hard enough at you
*Yawns are Contagious- like even the thought of a yawn makes u want to yawn... Everytime I type the word yawn I feel the urge
*Itches spread- like when u have a itch in one place once that itch is relieved u start to itch in other places...I even read about some ones noes itching and mine started to itch

Do you have any more weird contagious and spreading things